Guns Have Rights (gordsd 1st attempt)

Advanced contributor gordsd
posted 86 comments!

Here’s what I made up from some earlier suggestions: Rembow had the idea for the song and chords (but I changed the rhythm and style a bit—a lot?) 3jBlank pretty much wrote the lyrics (which I changed a bit). Please don’t excommunicate me for this. I know I have too much time on my hands, so this gave me something to do. Please feel free to degrade me and the stuff I made up as you please; I’m sure I deserve it! Rembow, I did it for you! I hope you either like it or have a good laugh!

[intro]
I went down to the river and there was blood in the water

In the end, the guns gonna win
cuz it aint got, no control

The last two standing, gonna die
By the gun, or a loss of a soul

[chorus]
Tension, hence the gun, hence the gun, hence the gun 2x

I went down to the river and there was blood in the water

The gun got a right, all its own
it never kills, all alone

When a gun holds its trigger, someone will fall
Silence ends, justice calls

[chorus]
[instrumental bridge]

I went down to the river and there was blood in the water

If a gun had rights, I’d never been born
Driven to love, I toot my horn

Invention, igniting
Actions, raising
[chorus]

Thanks for listening!

This entry was posted in:
Tags: , , , .
Bookmark the permalink.

12 Responses to Guns Have Rights (gordsd 1st attempt)

3jBlank
Commented:  February 28, 2013 at 4:49 AM()

It’s gotta beach boys feel in the guitar work, a Zappa feel in the vocal rhythm & style, and with additional effects it would almost have a “Riders In The Storm” by The Doors essence.

    Thanks. I’ve had others tell me that my style is a little Beach Boy. I never thought of the Doors, but you’re right. Too. after listening to the song, it reminded me of background music to old Clint Eastwood movies: “The Good, the Bad and the Ugly” or “Fist full of Dollars” ? Do you like the way i used your lyrics?

3jBlank
Commented:  February 28, 2013 at 1:57 PM()

I enjoyed listening to your idea. You are “in the moment” of what you’re singing, and you are “feeling it”.

If I were to take it on, I’d probably change the timing of the wording, & add a few aspects to tie the whole meaning of the song together for the lyrics to fulfill on a complete message (I say that’s what I’d do, but that doesn’t necessarily mean I’d be ABLE to do it, yet it’s what I hear possibly missing, or as a possible enhancement to have others connect with the song).

What I enjoy most is mainstream music, with a side of Classical & Progressive Rock. I’m not a big fan of folk (I was when I was a kid, though Classical was still my first) and folk is the closest genre/style I can figure to categorize your first attempt at putting those lyrics to music.

I think you did a great job. So my answer is, “yes” I liked the way you used the lyrics.

I always try and respect an artist decisions. You came up with a good
song here, but I was a little put off. I thought the music you originally had, was more fitting the subject, and I was looking forward to how that came out. This song has alot of good in it, but the words and music don’t quite put me in the same place. I like your guitar throughtout.

Jim

    Thanks for listening. Yeh, I could not capture Rembow’s original guitar work and feel. And I used 3jBlank’s lyics because they were posted. But I agree with you, Rembow’s guitar work was definately very cool and mine is a little metronomish, but I appreciate your kind words about the guitar. I have to get some more time to work on it some more.

kessmonsters
Commented:  March 11, 2013 at 6:48 PM()

i’m having a hard time equating Tension = hence the gun. i think you need to put more info into relating these two terms. i mean when i think of the word Tension, a gun would be way down on my list of synonyms. i’m also having a hard time with the musical flow. good effort.
every effort is a learning experience, just keep writing my friend, kess

    Thank you for listening Kess and thank you for your comments; I take them serious and, when I get some time to dedicate to this song, I’m going to try and make the changes everyone brought up.

andyburr
Commented:  March 13, 2013 at 9:22 AM()

It’s really spoken more than sung, which seems okay, really. I, too, hear The Doors, mostly in the vocal delivery and the guitar work. But as someone suggested, you may want to work on the timing of the words to get a more natural-sounding delivery. And check the pitch on some of the words to make sure you’re getting what you want. As it’s just a 1st draft, I’d say it has real potential.

    Thanks for listening Andyburr. I’m going to dedidicate some more time to doing a re-do. I’m working on another project right now. Thanks for saying that it has potential. I really like the chord progression in the chorus–which Rembow came up with.

I’ll go out on a limb here. I’m not familiar with the history of this composition so give me a break. My impression is that there is a sexual metaphor somewhere in the lyric. Maybe its the lyrics “I went down to the river and there was blood in the water” or the bit about the gun having a right all its own and raising. you get my drift. Probably not but that could be cool 🙂

I really like the music. Its got a lot of tension as you say. I keep feeling like there should be an answer at the end of the lyric in the chorus instead of just another tag. I like the vocal delivery. It works for me but I will say that it’s working in a corny quirky way. Hope I didn’t miss the point too bad but those are my first impressions. I enjoyed the listen.

    I appreciate the comments. Rembow came up with original idea and chord progression and 3Jblank pretty much wrote the lyrics. I decided to try and put them both to together and record it. Rembows original work on the guitar had a lot grittier feel to it. Anyway, I really liked the chord progression he came up with. Now that you mention it, the sexual connotation/metaphor does work, and, no, I didn’t think of it that way, but now i do! LOL! I think the answer in the chorus is a good idea. “Happiness is a warm gun”
    thanks for listening, Gordon.

Leave a Reply

Music Gear Shop

Follow Us

Link to our Contact
Link to our Facebook Page
Recommend this page!
Link to our Rss Page
Link to our Twitter Page
Link to our Website Page
Link to our Youtube Page