I Fly (revised)

Expert contributor gofirjet
posted 202 comments!

This is a rewrite base on recent critiques here and elsewhere. Created using Logic Pro X. Thanks for listening and commenting.

I Fly With You

Verse:
I’ll get my feet back on the ground
And my thoughts will be clear
My heart’s never let me down before
But my head’s in a cloud

Chorus:
I fly with you
Higher than I wanted to
Defying gravity
Yeah, I fly with you

Verse
Gettin’ higher approaching cloud nine
It’s a feel good ascent
Addiction I can’t overcome
Altitude affliction

Bridge: Am Em Am B
Have I lost my senses – or just my mind
Envision descending – afraid of heights

©2013 Bob Sell

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18 Responses to I Fly (revised)

Toney Wright
Commented:  August 14, 2013 at 11:18 PM()

Great job Bob!! The drums sound right on the money to me. I still think a saxophone or flute arpeggio would sound good at 0:34 to 0:37 and when it comes back around.And 2:04 to 2:20 blew me away!! I’m a lyric man and I gotta tell you The lyrics are uncompromised!! don’t change a word!! this is a song I would like to do. vocals…. David Bowie or maybe Mark Knopler.

    Toney Wright
    Commented:  August 14, 2013 at 11:40 PM()

    Hey Bob!! I just gave you a new name “Highway Bob!! I’m gonna get out on the highway and listen to you!!

    Hey Toney, thanks for the Highway name! Your comments are a great inspiration to me! Gives me the motivation for the next project! Thanks again for listening. I’m going to check out the artist you referenced in your post…

Toney Wright
Commented:  August 15, 2013 at 12:04 AM()

J.J Cale would love this!!

excellent revision, sir… and I quite agree with “Highway Bob”. …. and… if you ever need art… give a holler. http://www.artwanted.com/artist.cfm?ArtID=44564&Display=Med&SGID=0&Page=0. Ken Keegan

Joe fame
Commented:  August 15, 2013 at 10:17 AM()

Not my cup of tea. I don’t like pure synth produced tunes and I think your vocals are weak. At times it sounds like a Sonic the Hedgehog video game soundtrack. The lyrics are kind of weak but the part where you say your flying higher approaching cloud 9 was clever. I wish I had more positive things to say but, like I said, this is not my favorite style of music.

    Hey Joe, I was able to find one thing constructive in your criticizing comment! I’m not familiar with Sonic the Hedgehog video game but it’s great to know there’s a market for this song as a soundtrack! Thanks for the idea!

joeyj2101
Commented:  August 15, 2013 at 10:18 AM()

Great job!!!! Good mix and perfect FX! Very clean! Atleast I think so!!!

Andy
Commented:  August 16, 2013 at 9:06 AM()

The Boss has hit it again…damn….Highway bob is right… the man is on a roll. Change ups are awsome…lead ins…perfect…you gettin a handle on dem drums. Nice change in sound from the county.

    Thanks Andy! Yeah, I’m trying to do more electronic music these days. I’m going to track live drums and add some electric guitar parts in the chorus. It will be an interesting mix! Thanks for the listen and commenting. Bob

imagineyes
Commented:  August 16, 2013 at 7:13 PM()

I think this song works. I like your vocals – the timbre of your voice, delivery, effects. Overall, good production, well balanced – I like the idea of the half-chorus instrumental, that was cool – yeah, good job, I would say.

BossMan
Commented:  August 18, 2013 at 6:58 AM()

I can feel the hook in the song but it just didn’t set with me. Regardless of the electronic style you project, there is potential in the melody.

Tukeyz
Commented:  October 28, 2013 at 10:00 AM()

Wow! fantastic i love it. I loved the lyrics and the bridge. Well done bob.

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